I'm Going to Like New Mexico

I’m going to like New Mexico.
Once I set my mind to something, it usually happens.
I have been that way my whole life.

When I was seven I would have dreams about my room. I have always loved furniture and decorating. I would have dreams for months and months about the cute ways to decorate my room. Well, I was only 7….or maybe 8. The point is I was young. So I began using my job as “horse girl” to save my money to decorate my room. I would “pick” which means remove all the poop of about 5 stalls a day. But that isn’t it.

I was a perfectionist “picker”. After I picked a stall, a human being could sleep in it. I charged a dollar per stall. I would spend sometimes an hour per stall (on the bad ones) for a dollar. It didn’t matter how much I got payed. I think I did it for my sheer love of taking something completely poop ridden and making it beautiful. But then I got paid fifty cents for feeding and fifty cents for taking the horses out to the pen and fifty cents for bring the horse in from the pen. I rarely spent money unless I could convince someone to take me to sonic which I also dreamed about and I would splurge in a cherry limeade and maybe even some mozzarella sticks.

Well, before I knew it I was a wealthy poop picking horse girl, and I had my mom take me to target where I picked out my new bedding. That bedding has stayed on my bed until I just moved my bed here to ABQ. I think it is a little bit tacky now, but when I was 8 I thought it was just gorgeous. I then convinced my dad to paint my room pink…a lovely ballerina pink. I felt so girly in my pink room even though after all, I was a poop picking horse girl.

My point is, when my mind is set I usually do whatever it takes to make what needs to happen happen…even when poop is involved.
I am going to like New Mexico. It is going to happen. Some of you may be in shock.

Wait, you don’t already like New Mexico?

Well…I did….sorda
You see New Mexico isn’t a bad place to visit. There is no humidity. There is a breeze. If you stand in the shade it is at least 10 degrees cooler. We have an adorable apartment that looks out to the mountains and my guapo husband is here. Really, it is fantastic!

But we have lived here four months. It is feeling a lot more like we live here than we are visiting. I don’t know if I fully knew I disliked New Mexico until I found out I was pregnant. Living your life with your husband can really happen anywhere but when raising a family comes into the picture, I got a lot pickier.

Okay….let's just be honest.

I got a lot naggier. I became a nag. It’s true…how gross is that?

The thought of raising my kids in New Mexico just made me want to puke….or wait, maybe the puke thing is just from the smell of last night’s left overs? Goodness, the puke thing could be from any smell. Let’s be honest.

The truth is I just couldn’t imagine having babies in New Mexico. I had always imagined being pregnant and being close to all my friends and family. They would all be around me and grab my stomach all the time. My friends and I would take funny prego photos and my family would be close to help me practice breathing. When I would have cravings I would call a sweet girlfriend, and we would go to Square One and get French onion soup or Free Birds or I would just meet my sister at Chuy’s in Houston, and we would have fajitas and that amazing green dip.

The baby would be born and everyone around it would love it and tell it that it was beautiful (because after all, mom would be close by ready to punch if anything else was said). But if we are honest, how many new borns are beautiful? I’m sure I’ll think mine will be but usually they look like aliens, at least the first month.

I would have a plethora of wise women to call when I don’t know how to nurse or know how to do anything. My mom would be close, Jenn would be close, Sonja would be close, and Heather could be my nursing helper in the middle of the night. Doesn’t she do that? Plus there would be at least a few Aggie Wranglers close by to help me teach the baby dance moves from an early age. If the baby sees other people doing funny dance moves, it will think they are cool and want to do them.

But New Mexico?

The people don’t smile in the grocery store.

No one says Ya’ll.

The food…aye I want to puke again.

I know one really cool mom that is wise.

That is not even close to a plethora.

It is so dry that the boogers in your nose always dry and hurt.

The baby is always going to have dry boogers poor thing.


We are making friends and learning to love people but ya know…it takes time. If people don’t love us, how are they going to love the baby?

My family and friends have to love me and have to love the baby. I’m going to have to have some stranger nurse lady come over in the night when I cry and can’t feed my baby instead of a familiar face…booo.

I could go on. But didn’t I say I was going to love New Mexico?

I am.

I am going to stop thinking about the food or the fact that people don’t smile at me and just start putting more Vaseline in my nose for the dryness.

I have always liked Texas. But what I miss are the people. The community…the comfort I had in the amazingly, precious people around me. When you have that, it doesn’t matter if it is 100 with 99% humidly or if there is crazy traffic.

God called Adam here.

Called me to marry Adam.

Thus, God called me here.

He knew I would fit in better with people who smiled all the time and enjoyed country dancing. But he called me to New Mexico. I have to be happy. I have to support my husband.

I have to apologize to Adam. I apologize for being a complaining nagger. I apologize for not being a help mate. I was like a Nag Mate.

Right now it is uncomfortable. We are still making friends and just picked a church and are those awkward new people that smile a lot and hug people way too fast. But maybe God doesn’t want us comfortable. Maybe he wants us to rely on him and cling together. I’m so social, I think it is very possible for me to cling to my precious girls. But he took me away from all my comfortable, precious friends. I’m here now to cling to my husband and be a light here in New Mexico where it uncomfortable.

I know in time, I’ll love New Mexico. I’m going to start loving it a little more today.